ASMR: A Personal Journey

Looking back on the weeks and months before Mike died, there were so many odd coincidences that when they happened didn’t seem to mean much, but after he died they seemed to fit a pattern.  This pattern helped me very much deal with his death in the days, weeks and years after.  One of the things I found was Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response (ASMR).  I found these videos on YouTube by accident one night.  I was on YouTube and an ASMR video came up as a suggestion for a video to watch and I clicked on it out of curiosity.  ASMR is not well understood, but it is currently being studied.  Some people describe a tingling or goose- bump feeling in response to hearing tapping sounds, whispering voices or watching someone make deliberate movements with their hands.

I feel none of this when I watch ASMR videos.

What ASMR does do is help me relax and feel calm.  I especially feel calm listening to tapping and scratching videos that do not have talking in them.  In fact, after Mike died, I listened to several YouTube ASMR content creators that posted videos of themselves gently tapping on various objects.  These videos helped me sleep and relax. 

Recently (this article is being written in April 2025) I decided I wanted to give back to the ASMR community and also to try and help others by creating my own ASMR videos.  My goal is to create a community online using my blog and my ASMR videos to help people.  I would especially like to reach widows and widowers, sometimes this segment is forgotten in our society and so many are suffering silently in a world that does not understand the loss of a partner unless someone else has gone through that loss.

 My YouTube account is Retreat Into ASMR.  Creating a YouTube account is not easy and I didn’t expect it to be.  However, along with learning about how to maintain a WebBlog, I am now learning how to create ASMR videos.

I hope my videos help you to relax or inspire you in some small way.  Step by step, idea by idea, you too can start moving forward slowly on the path to your new life.  A life that honors your past and your future.  You can do this.  It doesn’t matter if you try and fail or try and succeed, you got this my friends.

This video is gentle tapping and a good example of ASMR that would help me relax and sleep after my spouse died.  Others have found ASMR helpful too.  Not much is known about ASMR, but it helps so many people, that it is being researched to find out why it helps so many people.

Another video that is an example of a way to help you focus and relax.